While being skeptical can be a healthy way to avoid getting
taken advantage of, being pessimistic - that is, always assuming
the worst - can have major negative consequences on your life.
Seeing only the negative aspects of any situation can cause you to
miss opportunities, neglect problems that need to be solved, and
fail to take action that would otherwise improve your relationships
and quality of life. Optimists, so much more at peace with the
world, train themselves to look for the light at the end the
tunnel. If you've always had a pessimistic worldview, it can be
difficult to shift your focus, but it is possible to start
seeing the glass as half full.
Steps
- Let go of the assumption that the world is against you,
or that you were born with a gray cloud over your head. It
is an assumption that has no basis in reason or science. To believe
that the universe or a spiritual entity has singled you out and
shifted the world order just to make your life miserable is both
self-centered and illogical. Be humble and stop pretending you've
got the world all figured out. Sometimes bad experiences lead to
good experiences, and you can't predict the future, so you can't
assume it'll always be bad.
- Look for the source of your pessimism.
Deep-rooted negativity can often be traced to childhood
experiences, when growing minds observe their circumstances and
make presumptions about how the world functions. If all you saw
growing up were disappointments, betrayals and failure, it's no
surprise that now it's what you expect from the world as an adult.
Sometimes we pick up a flair for pessimism from a parent who made
negative assumptions about the world somewhere along the line.
Either way, the sooner you can attribute your pessimism to a unique
set of circumstances rather than the state of the world itself, the
easier it'll be to change your perspective.
- Understand that the past does not equal the
future. Just because you've experienced pain or
disappointment in the past does not guarantee that it's all you'll
experience in the future. There were many things in your past that
you couldn't control, and everybody comes across unfortunate
circumstances at some point in their lives - you're no exception.
But there are also many things in life we can control to
one degree or another, and therein lies the possibility of change.
A day or week that starts badly will not necessarily end badly. Do
not make a bad start turn into a self fulfilling prophecy for a bad
ending.
- See yourself as a cause, not an effect. You
don't have to be a product or a victim of your circumstances. Stop
thinking about what is happening to you and start thinking about
what you can make happen. If you're not happy with the way your
life is now, set goals and move on. Use your past negative
experiences to build character and make better decisions, instead
of letting pessimism turn you into someone who avoids risk at all
costs. Sometimes it is necessary to take risks to receive rewards.
Moreover, taking no action is taking an action. It is better to
play to win rather than merely to avoid losing.
- Accept pain, failure and disappointment as a part of
life, not the entirety of it. Life involves taking many
risks every day, and not all of them will end positively. That's
what defines risk. But the flip side is that some actions
will lead to good results, and it's generally better to
have a mixed bag than to have nothing at all. Ideally, the good
stuff will outweigh the bad, but you'll never reach that point
unless you put yourself out there and hope for the best. When in
doubt, remember Lord Alfred Tennyson's words of wisdom:
I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow
