If you are harboring some truly harmful secrets, you may need
additional assistance. If you are just painfully shy, read on!
Steps
- Learn to trust people, especially yourself. We all make
mistakes; in admitting them and making amends, we grow and learn.
Most people don't harbor resentment forever - if they do, they are
not worth worrying about. Move on from the reasons that make you
secretive and start being more open.
- Don't hold in what could help others heal and move on. If your
secrets are hurting others, consider getting them off your chest.
You may be uncomfortable at first, but you'll feel better in the
long run.
- Contain your self-indulgent need to harbor secrets. If you are
the kind of person who just has to keep a secret to feel alive, at
least make it a harmless one.
- Put yourself in the other person's shoes. How would you feel if
they were secretive with you? You'd absolutely hate it, right?
Well, if yes is the answer, take a long and hard look at yourself.
It may just be that keeping secrets has become a source of power in
your mind and you mete out information when you feel it is
strategic to your own advancement. In the meantime, people have
grown tired of you and friendships fall by the wayside. Is that
worth it?
- Start talking. Being open is wonderful. There is less need to
be afraid and in being sincere towards others, you'll feel a lot
more emotionally healthy inside.
Tips
- If you are secretly in love with someone, say, someone you've
known forever, just shut up and kiss him or her. Or ask that person
on a date. He or she will probably be thrilled. Of course, exercise
caution and commonsense. Telling your married friend you love him
or her to pieces will not go down well unless you make it clear it
is as a friend and nothing more - use the right tone, right moment
and right reasons. If you really do feel more deeply than you
should, that is a secret in and of itself and ought to be talked
out with somebody so that you can hurdle it rather than harbor
it.
- Remember, too, that you don't have to tell everyone everything;
you're entitled to a private life.
Warnings
- If you are carrying a deep, dark secret, or one that could hurt
you or others, tell a trusted friend, parent or mentor. Don't be
afraid to ask for help.
Things You'll Need
- Courage
- Luck
- Communication
- A sense of humor
