How did rituals help you cope with your BDD?
The rituals that I did helped me cope with my BDD. In my early twenties I remember going out and getting a lock for my door. I did not want anyone inside my room. Because I did not want anyone touching my bed sheets, touching my towels because I felt like if their hands were not clean when they touched it, they were going to get it dirty. I would wash my towels after every use, so I was washing towels twice a day. I had to shower in the morning. I had to shower in the night. I had my morning ritual of what skin products I would use. Rituals at night what skin products I had to use. I was obsessed with what time I would go to bed and what time I would wake up and how much sleep I got. I could only use hand soap once. So I would buy a complete thing of hand soap, two dollars a thing. I would use it once and once I was done I would throw it away cause I felt like if I touched it, the entire soap inside got dirty if my hands were dirty. And now I needed new hand soap. So it did not make sense, but I was buying brand new things all the time because I felt like new was clean. And that meant my skin was clear, so everything kind of went back to that. I was cleaning my car. I was vacuuming my car. I was constantly washing my clothes, constantly washing my face. Looking in the mirror all the time. It just became an obsession. So now every moment was doing some kind of ritual for my BDD.
