Should we avoid doing things as a family even if our divorce is amicable?
Many people who have amicable divorces, good divorces, who often do things as a family and there's a positive aspect to that, it actually keeps the family unit in some perspective whilst developing two separate family units because when there is divorce, there's two homes, two separate family units but if you can maintain a nuclear family unit without compromising the other two family units, its fine. That means that as long as your spouse and you agree there's two homes, their gain together is still good on occasion. It becomes problematic when children expect it to happen and when you start having new spouses, then it becomes trouble because children have come to expect their Mom or Dad is always at Thanksgiving or Christmas and all of a sudden the new spouse doesn't want Mom or Dad there and it becomes a problem. So I think a limited contact of course for birthdays and school events, parents should be together but don't overdo it, children even adolescents will say "its unusual, it's weird, it's strange, you know if you guys can do it now, why can't you live together and if you can't do it, I don't need to see it", so children have lots of opinions about this, for most part. The best idea is to be polite and kind and go to all those common events but you don't need to do a lot together because you're no longer that singular family, you're two separate families.
