What are the various levels of relationship stress?
When it comes to relationships, stress basically comes in four sizes or four levels. Level one stress is basically no stress, and almost no one I've ever met has that level of stress in their relationship. Level two stress is the mild kind. It's when boundaries are getting crossed here and there, things are happening, but people tend to work it out and get along. Level three stress is moderate. That's when it's a little more serious and there's some questioning of whether things can be worked out and it's at this point that therapists tend to see people on their couches. Level four stress is nuclear warfare. We've all known couples who do nothing but fight and that's when nobody's needs are getting met. There's this feeling that if we can just shout at each other loud enough we can get back to that positive, idealized transference phase where the other person was perfect. However, we know that that's not possible and so those couples are locked in this endless battle for something that will never happen.
