How To Appear More Confident

How to look confident? Now, this is something I have done a lot of research on because I wrote a book two years ago called 'The Star Qualities' which was all about what actors have learnt over the years about confidence and when I started researching the book, I thought that the A-list actors I was talking to, even though I taught actors for years, would be confident and once I learned which has really helped me is that no one is confident. Even Helen Mirren, Oscar winning Helen Mirren gets shaky hands when she has to make a speech. She told me.

And when she has to go to a bar after a show, she feels nervous. So, what that taught me is that actually, no one really ever feels truly confident. Most of us inside are feeling a bit nervous and the thing with confidence is it's about the enthusiasm and the excitement about what you are doing that allows you to step over the nerves and get on with it and actually feeling a little bit nervous or feeling a bit unsure makes you a nicer person as long as you can step over it and get on with what you have to do.

And in researching the book, I have learnt a few tips and tricks that I am going to share with you. I think the first thing I learnt while talking to people like Helen Mirren is that actually, confidence is a lot about knowing what you do well and also having a sense of humour about what you cannot do well and standing somewhere in the middle of that. Standing between your strengths and weaknesses because the truth of the matter is that absolutely no one is perfect and how boring if you were? It would be the most boring thing in the world, so allow yourself not to be perfect and then work on the skills that you want to develop and have a sense of humour about what you can't do.

So, the next thing is to think about what your inner critic is doing. This is the voice in your head, sometimes says “Oh, you can't do that, or you are going to mess it up or you are not good at that,” and this voice is something that most of us have got but we have really got to learn to turn it down when you are performing. It is useful sometimes but definitely not when you are walking into a party or you are doing a job interview.

So, first of all, work out where it is. Is it high or low? Is it in the back of your head? Is it your parents' voice? Is it your teacher's voice? And then, once you have worked out what it is, then you can turn it down. You can actually turn down the volume on it so that it stops or you can turn it into Mickey Mouse which makes it a bit funny or the actor Bill Nighy says he actually talked back to it and he says, “What do you mean? Of course, I can do it, I will be fine.

” Then, once you have talked back to your inner critic, you can actually start to hear the voice that says, “Of course, you can do it, you are going to be fine,” and you can turn that voice up to give you confidence. You will notice that you start to feel better as soon as you do that. The next step, if you are wanting a bit more confidence, is that what is called acting it or fake it till you make it.

Also, some research has shown that if you imagine that you are someone with confidence, it will help you. It actually changes your brain and it changes your behaviour, so often with clients, I have got them to imagine that they may be a Helen Mirren or they are a very confident business woman or they are someone like Ewan McGregor going into a meeting and that can actually give you a bit of confidence and it can be anybody that you admire, that you want to be like. Imagine walking into the meeting as them and you will just feel more confident even though no one notices what you are doing.

And the final tip is that if you really want confidence, you have got to address your physical state because nerves are often physical. We get a shaky voice, we get shaky hands so it is really useful learning how to breathe and learning how to centre your state and I would say go to a yoga class, learn