How To Avoid A Bar Brawl

Step 1: Put some distance between you

Push them away, but don't get involved in any conflict. Look around for something to put between you- a physical barrier, like a table.

Step 2: Don't be a hero

Fighting people in pubs is illegal, and rightly so. Regardless of who ‘started it', swinging from the chandeliers and throwing punches may work pretty well in westerns but it certainly isn't going to curry you any favours whatsoever with Her Majesty's Constabulary.

Calm down, and use violence ONLY as a last resort in self defence. Keep in mind that even then you're on shaky legal ground.

Don't go picking up weapons, that's against the law. You never know if someone's got a knife, and you don't want to escalate things.

Step 3: Extract Yourself

‘Extract yourself' sounds cool. It sounds like the sort of thing the SAS do. It's certainly not running away, so don't worry about your reputation. You're not running away, you're extracting yourself.

Don't take your eyes off your attacker for a second, and certainly don't turn your back.

If the situation's going from bad to worse, you simply need to get out. Don't try and save face – if the guy's got it in for you, head for the exit.

If they do start throwing punches, learn to avoid them. Sidestep should do it, or if you move towards your attacker, 9 times out of 10 a punch will go right over your shoulders.

Step 4: If things kick off

These things happen fast. One minute they think you're looking' at them funny, the next they're throwing punches.

It's worth reiterating that it's not worth getting involved. Lives are ruined by brawling, so the smartest and safest thing you can do is peg it out the front door and find a quieter boozer in which to drink in future…