Technology & Cars

How To Commit Facebook Suicide

Fed up with irritating applications, moronic group requests and unwitty facebook status comments? Why don't you do the good thing and throw in the facebook towel? Just admit it and say it out loud, 'I hate facebook!' You don't have to suffer anymore, just follow this advice to quit and commit facebook suicide! Enlarge

How To Commit Facebook Suicide

Fed up with irritating applications, moronic group requests and unwitty facebook status comments? Why don't you do the good thing and throw in the facebook towel? Just admit it and say it out loud, 'I hate facebook!' You don't have to suffer anymore, just follow this advice to quit and commit facebook suicide!

Step 1: Inform your friends

Before you bite the facebook bullet you should send a message out to all your facebook friends to warn them that your quitting, and to pass on your email address to them.

Step 2: Deactivate your account

Unfortunately you can't just simply quit facebook; like the Eagles Hotel California, "you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave." This is because your only option when quitting facebook is to 'deactivate' your account. This leaves it stored, with all your details and information, on facebook's servers, ready to be reactivated at any time.
You can rail about surviellance society, 1984, and corperate control all you like but you put all your details up their in the first place so get over it!

If you don't want facebook to keep any information about you then quit all groups; leave all networks; remove all friends from your friend list; delete all photo albums, wall messages and comments until your profile is completely sanitised.
Now you can go into the account tab, scroll down to the bottom of the screen and click on the deactivate link, select one of the reasons for quitting and click on the opt out of email's from facebook box, just to be on the safe side, and finally deactivate your account and never be bothered by Mr Zuckerberg and his cronies ever again!