Relationship Issues: Sex

Relationship Issues: Sex

Sex can become a common source of tension for couples, particularly after a year or two in the relationship. Relationship Psychotherapist Paula Hall gives this advice to help you stop arguing about sex.

After a couple of years in a relationship, it is not uncommon for sex - particularly the frequency and regularity - to become a source of tension. Normally the man wants it more often than the woman, and this causes arguments.

This is because men have up to 40 times more testosterone that women, and it is common for a woman's sex drive to drop off after a couple of years of being with a partner. This can make the man feel unwanted or rejected, and in return the woman may feel guilty that she's not providing for her partner's sexual needs.

Be aware though that the differences are biological, not personal. If you're the man you need to know that it's not you she's rejecting, but sex itself.

Make sure you both have other ways of showing each other affection, and don't let sex become a battleground. The more you fight about frequency and regularity, the less likely you are to have sex. The closer you are as a couple, the more likely you are to have sex.