Relationship Issues: Tidying Up

Step 1: The Problem

This argument is about one person feeling the other is too untidy around the home

Step 2: What it's really about

This is a very common complaint. Perhaps this argument is not really just about lack of tidying up, but about a perceived lack of respect for a shared personal space. Equally less tidy people can feel undermined if their partner is too tidy, as if the tidiness is more important than their feelings.

Step 3: The solution

As soon as this situation occurs, sit down and share any feelings of concern with your partner without arguing. Perhaps you come from very different backgrounds, with very different standards of tidiness? It is very imporntat for the space you share to feel comfortable for both of you. Listen to each other, and accept that you need to come up with a level of tidiness that is not distressing for either of you. Find a happy medium and live with it!