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What To Do If You Suspect Your Child Is Gay
If you think you child might be gay or lesbian, you might be wondering what to do next? Should you confront your child, or wait till they bring up the subject? Our film is packed with advice for parents in this situation.
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Step 1:
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Preparing the ground
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Try raising homosexuality in a general way - discuss a story in the paper or from the TV and show you have an open mind and are accepting of sexual difference, and see how your child reacts.
Acknowledge that there are some things we all have in our lives which are private and personal, but if they ever had anything they'd like to share with you, you hope you would be able to be supportive and understanding.
If you ever had anxieties when you were growing up about your own sexual identity, then it might help to share something about that, but be careful not to imply you ‘grew out' of your phase and so they will too.
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Step 2:
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Whether to ask
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It can sometimes help to ask the question directly - perhaps whether they have wondered if they might be lesbian/gay or bisexual rather than “are you gay?”.
But remember that if they say 'no' don't push the subject or be intrusive. It may be that your child is not actually gay, or maybe they are just not be ready to come out yet, and need some more time.
Talking about these issues may be difficult, particularly if you are a family who does not often discuss personal matters You child may be scared of discussing it directly, and may even try to give you clues, like leaving gay literature lying around. It could well be that your child may want you to ask them the question.
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Step 3:
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Accept
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Sometimes it can take a person a long time to accept themselves, and YOU may be more accepting of their possible homosexuality than they are.
Reassure them that your love for them is unconditional, and you only want them to be happy in life, whatever they are and whoever they love.
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