I lost my husband nearly 4 years ago suddenly due to a cardiac arrest whilst driving on a highway. Being a nurse, I performed CPR but after 25 mins waiting for an ambulance I knew my efforts would be futile. It was the worst day of my life. Even harder, was going home to tell my daughters, who were aged 9 & 10 at the time, that their father had died. People say over time it gets easier. I just think you learn to live with the change of situation you are now in rather than actually "get over it" Unfortunately, life does have to go on as much as we wish it didnt without the one we loved. My daughters have been the ones who have kept me going. Taking one day at a time is all we can do - some are good, some are not. You shouldnt have to be the strong one all the time.

i lost my husband 8 months ago he was in a motorcycle accident. i have three kids i feel so bad the pain is so hard to bare. we had been together for 21 years married for 8 he was my everything.everybody say its going to get better can somebody please tell me how and when.

I, too, lost my husband and best friend very suddenly in an automobile accident. I try so hard not to be angry with the seventeen year old who crossed the center line and hit us head on. Very simply put, I just want my life back. We married a week after high school graduation and had been married for thirty years. I don't know how to live with half of me literally gone. The accident took place a year and a half ago. For those of you who have suffered this type of loss recently, my heart breaks for you. All I know to do is pray for peace for you. I know that there's nothing anyone can say to make the heartache go away. Having walked in your shoes, I can say that gradually the pain does become bearable. There are still days that I don't want to get up, days that I'm mad at the world and the pain is bone crushing. One thing that keeps me going is hearing my husband always telling me that I was one of the smartest and strongest women he had ever known. He would be very dissappointed if I just gave up. Deb

I lost my husband 14 weeks ago to myeloma (cancer of the plasma cellls). I am sat hear wondering how to get through the day - then I found this site. I know that I am not alone and this is how life is sometimes...but its so very hard. What hurts most is how he suffered.

Man from Utah, your lady friend is obviously still grieving for her husband and is not ready for another realationship or to marry you. She may like your company and friendship but nothing else. She probably had sex with you either because she felt obliged to do so or she needed "comforting" at that time. It seems she now regrets sleeping with you and still wants you as a friend but nothing more. She said she wouldnt be suprised if you didnt want to talk to her anymore because she knows that you may not accept just being friends with hr and she knows you will be hurt by her decision. BUT it is her decision after all and you must respect that she has been honest with you about that. If friends are saying you are good for each other it dosent matter because you are not HER choice of man that she wants to be with. She still loves her husband and probably dont know WHAT she wants at the moment. She may want freedo to be alone for a while and then to meet somebody else. If you cant accept her as just a friend to be there when she just wants to talk then you must avoid contact with her for a few months and let her move on with her own life and you move on with yours as you cant be with someone who dosent want to be with you. It will also make you feel more hurt if you know she has got somebody else and if she is being nice to you, you may get false hopes that she wants you when she dosent. So move on without her as you cant be with someone who dosent want to b with you.

Wow, reading what seems to be everybody hurting in the same way, seems to be part of what happens when you lose a person you felt would be there forever . Having married this man at age 16 and not knowing any other love. He was called to his rest 2 years ago. Our children all have lives of their own. I feel very depressed most of the time, because like many others, life no longer makes sence. Yes there is joy in the grandchildren and our children and family. But these are very short lived times. The major parts of one who is left behind is spent lonley and trying to keep busy with day to day coming and going. Yet the pain is there. I don't think it is suppose to go away. Many times I do not want it to, because this way I know I am still alive. I try to think about the best time together 39 years there were lots of good memories. But they make me even more depressed and I start missing him even more at times.

I lost my husband almost 5 years ago - suddenly - I have so much anger in me because I just miss him so much. I am even remarried now but I never - ever - stop thinking about him. When does the grief go away. Does it ever stop hurting?!??!!

I lost my husband 7 weeks ago to a massive heart attach as well, its one day at a time, I am 36 with 2 children, the hurt does seem to get worse everyday, but there is nothing you can do except just to go through it. I have tried to make sense of it but that didn't wrk either. I used to be a firm believer that everything happens for a reason but I no longer know what to believe. I miss him and cry for him every single day. Just remember and love him! I am sorry that I do not have anything to help you with but at this point i am in the same position as you. Goodluck and remember they are always with us!! Ana

I lost my husband of 18 years 2 weeks ago we had 5 children and I'm just doing 1 step at a time the nights are the worse for me and everyone keeps telling me it will get better but how can it?

this is anomus again. i hope you can desypher my message. im the one from utah. i skipped around alot. email me at equalizer3@hotmail.com. im really going to miss her. im already crying. oh she wants me to stay and just hang out. im not sure if i can just do that. i also told her when i made love to someone that i was a one woman man and she came back and said she was a one man woman. i keep thing im going to be so hurt if im not the one and everything i have done for her. . i keep hopeing. im 53 and she is 50. she just sits there and stears at the back ground of her home page on her computer with a pic of her late husband. she has them all over. im hoping its going to be my. am i wrong. oh in the past it was like we were making plans of me moving back to pa. there isnt really anything holding me down out there. just ppl. equalizer3@hotmail.com