I THINK YOU NEED THE COURAGE TO MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE. I BELIEVE YOU KNOW THIS BUT NEED SOMEONE TO CONVINCE YOU YOU ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE AND YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN SHOULD BE AS HAPPY AS YOU CAN. I AM BEN AND WISH YOU WELL.

You should start by having a trial seperation say 6mths and tell him you both need space to see how you feel and that during that time that he must seek help and only see the children when supervised by another adult, maybe a family member or somebody from a family centre for their safety. In this time you either decide if you are better off without him or that you want to try again. 2 unhappy parents make unhappy kids, so its far better to be apart and happier for their sakes and to show them that you shouldnt put up with 2nd best so they can learn that for their own relationships in the future.

People or couples should i say either grow together or grow apart, maybe thats whats happened to you. It might not mean she has someone else but she may not fancy you anymore or just wants a sexless relationship. Its up to you to either acept that if you,ve already talked, or to move on with someone else that can make you happy. Love alone dosent make you happy as you know.

if you read this , then this is a real cry for help. i cannt seem to please my wife. she hates sex and she sez sex is just a a burden , she hates it and it doesnt do anything for her. i try to be superman and make love to her all night. last night night she suggested a trial seperation for the first time evr.wow that throw me back! weve been together ten years and and i never expectied that. the truth is i dony think i do anything for her and then she admittinted i t.i dont .but before ,i did and she was proper horney. am i avin my sellf on , or is she avin a affair?

y dun u sit n talk to him abt ths??make him understand wht he is doin...n tell him in a nice way tht no point being like ths...as d kids needs both of u....

in answer to some of your replies. it is not the 1st time, but before his anger was directed at me. 10 years ago he was diagnosed with depression and alcholism, 5 years ago the diagnoses changed to Bi Polar disorder. 3 months ago the diagnoses changed to emotionally unstable personality disorder. He is now on anti psycotic drugs. I did love him, but i dont think i do any more. the kids love him (and hate him too). I know i have to leave for the kids sake, also mine) at the moment i have no social life as i cannot leave him with the kids for more than a few minutes.

One you should not be exposing your children to such voilence. Children take in everything,you dont want the future of your kids being horrible. Does he have any mental problems,depression? If so he needs to get help. If he doesnt have any mental problems or depression then you need to take your children and leave,and dont turn back. the next thing he might do is go crazy and Hit you or the kids.

PEPPERMINT make marriage WORK with a violent partner when you have children?? What planet you on? The childrens wellbeing should come FIRST not the marriage or to save face. Children arent born violent, it is LEARNED in situations such as this, the wife must also keep her pride and self respect and show her daughters this is NOT how THEY should be treated by their husbands

IF YOU HAVE AN ADEQUATE INCOME WITHOUT HIM, LEAVE HIM. hE IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE. lIFE IS TOO SHORT, YOU NEED A BETTER LIFE.

you need a trial seperation to let him cool down and get himself togther then start from the begining again ie dating ect what ever you do do not stop him seen the kids this can push a man over the edge , a lot of woman just dont understand how much fathers love there children. if you try a trial seperation take time with it dont take him back after a few weeks there is nothing to stop you both still having affection and a sexual relationship but make him understand he is not comming home until you are 100 percent sure the vilonce has stopped