After The First Online Date
Should I e-mail someone after an internet date even if I didn't like them?
Hopefully, you will have done enough screening before you go on your first date with someone you met on the internet, so that you don't have a bad date and you do want to see them again. But sometimes you're gonna go out with someone and find the chemistry is just not there, no matter how much screening you've done. After that first date, if you're not interested, you should send them a standard reply: It was great meeting, however, I don't think we're a match. Good luck with your search. If they reply to you after that, just delete it. When we talk about standard replies, it's a great organization tip because you can type into a word document a standard reply, and then cut and paste it to the same people over and over again. You don't have to reinvent the wheel - it saves a lot of time, you don't have to think of what to say. Be polite, be concise: Thanks, I had a great time. I don't think we're a match. Good luck in your search.
What do I do if someone I don't like keeps emailing me?
If someone you are not interested in keeps emailing you, I think the answer is short and sweet - delete, delete, delete. Remember, the great thing about the internet and email is that you're in control. You can send them a reply and ask them to stop, and then you can delete them if they don't. If you still have trouble, you might want to block their profile if your site allows that.
How can I resist checking to see if someone I met on an online dating site still uses the site?
When you've had a great first date with someone, there might be some temptation to go back online to the online dating site and see if they're still active and they're looking for others. But I'd check that temptation. Until you've been on several dates, until it's clear to both of you that you've clicked, until you've actually said you're not seeing other people, there's no reason they shouldn't be on the dating site, and you can too. Remember, you control the rules of your dating, so if what you want is a monogamous relationship, that's great. Wait until you've grown into it with this other person, and then at that point discuss: "Hey, should we shut down our web membership? Should we hide our profiles?" You can have a conversation about it and decide together how you're going to handle it.
I'm an active internet dater, how do I keep track of all the people I'm dating?
When you try intenet dating, depending on what you're looking for, whether it's casual dates or a serious relationship, you're going to meet a lot of people if you want. You can have a date every night if you want. So how do you keep them straight? A lot of people think that once they go on these dates they just leave their online dating website behind. Maybe, but probably not. You're going to want to stay with your computer. You're going to want to use those files you started with to organize and create folders for every person you date, and keep notes about how you enjoyed the date. We have a tool called the Date Recap which after each date you write down things that worked and things that didn't work, so that you can compare them over a certain number of dates and see if that person's working for you. That also helps you keep straight in your mind. This person is these dates, this other person was these dates, and it helps you narrow down the field until you're only dating the one person who you've had the best dates with, and you've kept track of it along the way.