Celebutantes: Honorable Mention

Is Mischa Barton a celebutante?

Mischa Barton is an actress in Hollywood who skyrocketed to fame with "The OC," and was propped up to be the next Shannon Doherty or the next "Beverly Hills 90210" of our time. But then it all came crashing down because the show lost its cache, it lost its viewers, and she ended up sort of leaving the show because she became too big for it. Mischa went to the writers and said, "Why don't you kill me off?" And so they said, OK because she wanted out of her contract. So they were going to kill her off, and it was going to be this big hush-hush thing and then somebody leaked it to the press that her character died. And Mischa's famous for that. She's famous for leaking things to the press, but now it's come to bite her in the butt. Yes, Mischa's having a very, very hard time booking work. Ever since "The OC," she was projected as this girl who was very difficult to work with, she was very hard on set, she was very diva. And since "The OC," she got the BeBe campaign. It made her a lot of money. It put her back out there but she's having a very hard time getting roles. She's being considered for something and then it falls out. "Gossip Girl," a huge hit for the CW. She was considered for the role. She turned it down. Why would she turn it down? Who's to say. Correction. Mischa Barton was not considered for the Gossip Girl role. Yes she was. No. This is a classic case of leaking stuff to Hollywood, to use PR to your advantage. The executive producers of "Gossip Girl" came out yesterday, and said they had never considered her for the role. This is news to them. But her PR people wanted her to be back in the press and put her as an on-demand actress. So they leaked this story to the press that she was being "considered for a role," when in actuality it was just a publicity stunt to clean up her dirty image from the pot. Oh my god, and I fell for it. You fell for it! I didn't. What a sucker!

Are Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen celebutantes?

They are very strange. They've changed into strange fashionista victims. They are so scary with those glasses. They are kwipi dolls on drugs.Yes and they are total drug bugs. It's coming out so much right now. The Heath Ledger association. Mary Kate was partying with Heath so much before his unfortunate demise. Even Ashley's boyfriend has been arrested for drug poccession. Evan the company that those girls keep is very seedy. It's Euro trash at it's biggest.

Why does Amy Winehouse step out of her house tear-stained, track marked and bruised?

Amy Winehouse is a real talent. I wouldn't necessarily consider her a celebutante, because she came from nowhere, she wasn't in a wealthy family, she made her name with her talent, she's got a beautiful voice. Unfortunately, she has a terrible drug addiction. It's not a secret: she's a heroin addict, she's a cocaine addict. The reason she goes out in public looking a mess, with impetigo on her face and scratches and bruises is because she is high. She doesn't know to not go outside in public right now because she is truly and honestly a drug addict and it is unfortunate because she's such a talent but she doesn't know better to go out. She's not in America where there's fifty handlers controlling your every move, from your stylist to your publicist to your manager. She's in the UK, it's not so big over there, and she doesn't have a big entourage. Amy Winehouse emerges from her house with tears streaming her faces and scratches running down her arms and her eyeballs hanging all the way down to here because she is emerging from hell. She probably is in her house with a mattress on the floor and ashtrays. I heard a story that she left a hotel in London in such disarray after she lived there for two weeks that people were disgusted. She's emerging from a crack den. That's why she is crying. And she is really going in public high on drugs. She's not a drug addict just when she's inside; she's a drug addict 24-7. She's admitted to it. Her family's admitted to it. It's known that she's a drug addict. So when she is out in these public venues, she's high and she's high on crack, she really is high. I bought her DVD of her concert; she's high in the concert. I mean what about the time she was giving a concert and she's got this huge bee-hive, which I think is fabulous, and she reaches in her bee-hive, pulls out a vial of cocaine and snorts it on stage. We all saw the video, everybody saw the video, and it was great. She's a drug addict, people celebrate it and people define her by her addiction. And so in a sense she's trapped, the media is telling her she's a drug addict, her fans are telling her she's a drug addict, she's selling millions of albums, why change a formula that's working. And let's not forget that Amy Winehouse is our Billie Holliday. She's someone who thinks she can only create art when they are having a big drama in their life or when they are on drugs or when they are coming off of drugs. She thinks that is the time that she is most creative so she feels a perpetual need to stay in that cycle. She's inspired by adversity and unfortunately she only knows how to be inspired by adversity instead of something that's positive. She's soulful, she sings old school and so all of that emotion, all of that angst that intrigues us and pulls us in with her voice is also the thing that is costing her; her life in the end.

Are 'The Hills' girls considered celebutantes?

Who are 'The Hills' girls? You tell me. All I know is LC, Heidi Montag, Spencer Pratt. They're all just famous little popular rich kids from high school that we all secretly hated and secretly wanted to be, and now they're being put on television and being paid, you know, $50,000 an episode. Do we like them? Sure. (No!) Are they entertaining to watch? Sure. (No!) Will they do well? Sure! (No!) They make, you know, what? 1.5 million an episode. I mean, 1.5 million viewers an episode, maybe as high as three sometimes? That's a huge stat for an MTV show. You are making me sick right now. 'The Hills' girls are nothing better than celebutante juniors. They're not even related to famous people like our previous celebutante. Spencer Pratt is. Father's an executive at a record label. That's not famous person. Rich. Paris Hilton, Nikki, you know Nicole Richie. They're all related to famous people. These girls were just rich and pathetic. And pretty and thin. All the things that we love in Hollywood. And now they have a spin-off show. Laguna Hills! My God! Next it's going to be... No, 'Laguna Beach' was their first show. The spin-off show was 'The Hills' and it's doing even better than the previous show. 'The Hills' is doing huge. Skyrocketing these girls to fame for nothing else than the fact that they are rich. These girls do not like a normal life. No. They don't just get a job at Teen Vogue. Please. That girl would have never got a job at Teen Vogue. LC could never work at Teen Vogue, because she doesn't know how to work her computer. Yeah, click, click, click. Google search myself! Those girls make me mad, but I did meet them on several occasions, and they're very sweet. Call me!

Is Tara Reid a celebutante?

Tara Reid is the biggest, sloppiest has-been that has ever been in Hollywood. The poor girl she went from “I'll be a party girl because I'm not getting any roles” and then she was photographed and slaughtered by the press then she's like “I'll become anorexic because that's big.” Then she became really emaciated and she just looks like a mess. She's also another girl who's desperate to be taken seriously and she could come back with another role. People will always go into her and dig into her. But she could come back because she's an actress. American Pie was huge. No she was also in such winners as - god only knows, I can't think of any. Oh that's sad. Tara you're ok with me girl. I'll party with you girl, I'll party with you. She gets into Villa in West Hollywood which is the hardest club in Los Angles to get into. She gets in. Only so when she walks out her boob falls out and they get a picture. Well she's a celebutante - what do we expect. Let me sum up Tara Reid - Tara Reid is a celebutante minus the money so she's making all the same mistakes as the other celebutantes but since she doesn't have the money it's just a sloppy has-been actress making the same mistakes. OK when plastic surgery was big a few years ago and everybody was getting it, remember Jessica got her lip injections and everyone said oh my god don't do that again. She got her boobs done and she got them done by a bad plastic surgeon so she had to get them redone recently. This gave her tons of press. She also turned down American Pie two because she thought she was going to be this big amazing actress. When the thing was she was famous because of American Pie. She made all the wrong mistakes that all celebutantes do. She just didn't have the money to back it up.

What could Tara Reid do to make a comeback?

Do you remember her show on E!? Great idea! Taradise! I lived for that show.You just party with Tara! Oh my God! And you get completely drunk and you go on Cavalli's boat, and he gives you free jewelry, and you fall down! That's awesome! It's Taradise! Oh my god, that was a great show. I'm not going to lie. I love Taradise! But the problem with Taradise, besides the viewers like Lynn, was the fact that it demolished whatever image she had left, and she'll never be able to shed that party girl image. She might as well have done a Proactiv commercial. She's going to be hosting the Lingerie Bowl until like 2010. My God, that's what reality stars do! I mean, Trishelle from the Real World participates in that event. And I will tell Tara to go get a reality show, because maybe she could patch her image up. But she's already had a reality show. And I want a reality show, so get off the train, bitch! And it sucked.