Child Custody: New Partners And Residence

My children don't like my new partner - can I get residence?

The children's wishes and feelings are going to be a relevant factor. The children act says that the court must take into account children's wishes and feelings. Now if you have a partner that the children don't like, then again, that is likely to be relevant. Of course, most children, or a lot of children, don't like their parent's new partners. What most children want is their parents to be back together so it would perhaps be unusual to have a situation where children are saying, "Great. You know, I'd like to meet Mom or Dad's new partner." And, therefore, unless it's a serious issue, it's unlikely to have a significant impact. But if it is serious, if there's a real problem, then it's bound to have an impact and bound to be relevant to the court's consideration about what's in the best interest of that child.

My new partner has a criminal record - can I get residence?

no

I've been divorced three times - can I get residence?

There are many people these days who've been divorced three times. Well, perhaps not many who've been divorced three, but divorce is increasingly common and the fact that you've been divorced, however many times, isn't going to be a bar to getting a residence order. Residency is a question of the court looking at what's the best interests of the child because, of course, it's the welfare of the child that is the court's paramount consideration in the issue of residency. And mostly a judgement on residency is to do with practical consequences such as the parent who's able to provide the proper care and that sort of thing. Their own relationships are perhaps less relevant to the decision.

My new partner has lots of children - can I get residence?

The fact that one parent sets up a home with a new partner who has lots of children isn't necessarily going to be a bar or a benefit to them in making a residence order application. It's a question in each residency case of deciding what's in the best interest of the child, because of course the child's welfare is the core paramount of the parent's consideration. Residence should be considered practically: What are the new family arrangements? If there is a whole hoard of children living in the house, what are the arrangements for their sleeping? Do the children get on? Is it going to be an environment in which the child will enjoy, will flourish? It is better in some circumstances, perhaps, if they not getting on with the family that residency is granted to the other parent. Residency is very much a practical decision, and the simple fact of a new partner, or another family's other children, isn't going to be a bar.

If my ex is dating someone I think is unsuitable. Can I stop them having contact?

New partners are often something that causes issues for parents, understandably of course because parents are used to their children being with people they know, either themselves or their partner. And therefore the introduction of another person, particularly if that other person is going to be providing some parenting, can often be a flash point. One of the helpful things to do in those circumstances is actually to get the people to meet because in most circumstances when people meet they'll generally find that the other person perhaps isn't as bad as they thought. Of course, there may be circumstances where actually your former partner has got together with someone who is entirely unsuitable and if that's right and if, for whatever reason that's having a detrimental impact on the child, then there may be circumstances in which contact can be stopped or at least for it to be changed so that it takes place in a careful way. I wouldn't encourage anyone to stop contact because of a new parent. What's important is finding a dialogue to enable the co-parenting engagement to continue and that can be better addressed through things such as mediation or collaborative family law.