Guys And Sex

What really turns him on in bed?

He wants the naughty girl in bed, but he wants that classy lady to take around to parties and business functions and stuff like that. He wants you to be open to suggestions. He wants you to be fun. He wants you to be creative along with him. He wants you to be affectionate, loving, and warm. But yet, he also wants you to be the naughty girl that you really want to be in the first place also. He wants to have a good time with you in bed. He also wants you to be able to know how to please him. He does not like a woman that he does things to and she will not do things to. It is reciprocal. You know, a guy is pleasing a woman in ways she has got to learn to please him in certain ways. He just wants you to be sexually open to him and he wants you to be able to share his fantasies and share your fantasies.

How adventurous should I be the first time we have sex with a guy?

The first time you have sex, you should not get on the stripper pole and dance up and down. I don't think you should bring out sex toys. I don't think you should start screaming at the tops of your lungs, "Do me on the top of the Empire State Building." I think the first time you have sex is feeling each other out. Mellow. Feeling how each other's moves. Feeling what each other's touch is like. Getting to know each other a little bit. I think you can start bringing the kinky erotic stuff in a little later down the road. That first night, don't blow him away by the dirtiest thoughts in your mind. The first time you have sex, the most important thing is to see whether or not you've got sexual chemistry with each other. Not whether or not you can stand on your toes and have sex while taking a bath and eating a bowl of cereal. That stuff you can pick up the following week.

Why do guys want the lights on during sex?

It depends. I mean I like night sex and day sex. You know it is kind of like a day and night thing. I mean sometimes I love sex in the day time because I can see what I am doing. You know, a lot of guys like that because we like to see what we are pleasing. So we want to see her face go all contorted. We want to see all that stuff. Sometimes at night without the lights on sex is pretty amazing because all you hear is the sound of each other breathing and you know, you hear the sound of each other moaning and you just hear the sounds of moaning. So we like it both. Mix it up. Do not always have the lights on during sex. Do not always have sex in complete darkness. Do not always have sex in complete lightness. It is like when they took Wrigley field and they made it day night games. It gave a whole different experience.

What do I do if our sex life becomes routine?

There's a lot of things you can do. Sex life usually does get routine because people get very lazy in their sex life. So what you need to do is you need to spend one night a week creating a new type of sexual adventure. One of the things you can do is a sexual treasure hunt where you can actually leave little clues in the house, little clues in his office, emailing, maybe text messaging, turn each other on during the course of the day, meeting maybe in a bar where you've met, maybe you guys met at the bar, you met her in a coffee shop the first time having a cup of coffee, going home maybe the whole house has like candles lit or whatever it is. You need to do different things to spice up your sex life again. Maybe one week you do it, the next week he does it. Buy a book on tantric sex, learn different positions in sex, learn different ways to please each other. Give out a coupon for a night of erotic massage, do different things because if you're doing the same thing over and over again of course it's going to get boring. And I've always talked about that. I think I've read probably a hundred blogs about how to keep your sex life sparkling because most people don't know how. They get comfortable, they get bored, they give up, and 90% of relationships out there break up due to either money or sex. Money you have trouble fixing sometimes, sex you can always fix.

Why does a guy stop calling after we have sex?

It happens to both of us. Why would a guy stop calling? A couple different reasons. One, you slept with the wrong guy and he was just looking to put a notch on his belt. You didn't screen well enough. How do you know not, how do you know this ahead of time? You don't. Some guys are such fantastic sales people you'll never know ahead of time. If a guy doesn't call you after sex, it doesn't mean that you're ugly, doesn't mean you were bad in bed, it just means that he was in the player mode, he was just looking to get laid and that's it. There is nothing you can do about it. Don't bring that energy going forward because a lot of women will do that, they'll punish the next 17 guys because they made one mistake, and slept with one guy who didn't call them. It happens to all of us. It's happened to me, it's happened to you, it's happened to everybody.