How NOT To Propose
What's the biggest mistake men make when popping the question?
The biggest mistake that men make when popping the question is not really thinking about what it is that they want to say and not considering what her wishes are. In many cases guys just simply blurt out the first thing that is in their mind and you got to remember that you have got only one chance for that first proposal with her. So you got to really think about what you want to say and make sure that it comes from the heart.
What's wrong with simply asking?
There is really nothing wrong with simply asking if that is the way that she wants to be proposed to. If she is a spontaneous kind of gal, simply tell her, look her in the eye and say, "Babe, I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?" then that's OK. But in most cases, she's expecting a little more, so simply asking may be too simple.
Shouldn't a man always think big when it comes to a proposal?
Guys generally tend to think pretty big when it comes to a proposal and a lot of times, that's where we make our mistakes. In some cases, what she wants is a simple, traditional proposal that doesn't necessarily involve a lot of bells and whistles. I really think that thinking big is the appropriate thing, when you define 'big' as hitting the spot, making sure that you get the proposal that she's expecting. That's thinking big, and that's hitting it big.
What about proposing via e-mail, or on the phone?
Proposing via e-mail or on the phone or by text isn't generally recommended. Now, there are times when that might be appropriate. For example, in the way our world is today, a lot of our young men are stationed overseas or deployed overseas. If that's the case then it might be the most appropriate thing to do. To send your sentiments via e-mail or over the phone. But otherwise, do it the traditional way: face to face on bended knee so that she sees what's in your heart by what's on your face and hears it in your voice. That's the way to do it.
Should I be funny when I pop the question?
Humor is a fantastic aphrodisiac. In many cases, it's what brings people together. Should you be funny when you pop the question really depends on whether that's how your relationship takes place. If your relationship is based on a lot of humor and a lot of laughter, then funny might be the way to go. But in general, this is a very serious thing that you're doing, and it's one that you want her to remember forever. Sometimes humor masks the true feelings, and that's the last thing you want when you're proposing. You want her to know what's in your heart.
Are spontaneous proposals a good idea?
Spontaneous proposals can be fantastic. Usually you know when you want to propose and you're just waiting for the right moment. So you may be taking a stroll and the elements come together perfectly, and that's the right time. And that would be considered a spontaneous proposal. But a spontaneous proposal that's just born out the moment, that really has no thought to it, may be something you want to reconsider.
What's wrong with a public proposal?
There are a lot of things that could go wrong with a public proposal. The worst of all is that she may be so embarrassed that she might say no, that she's not ready. The public around you may not respond the way that you want them to respond. There are so many variables in a public proposal that are out of your control. But, there are, at the same time, so many things that could go so right. Imagine what it would feel like to be in a crowd and watch a young couple get engaged. Imagine being that person in a crowd and how you would feel. So that there's a lot of great things that could go right as well.