How To Help Your Child Adapt To Your Divorce

How can I help my child adapt to my divorce?

One of the things we would like parents to do is to not have their child cope with the divorce but to actually adjust to the divorce and then adapt to it and feel comfortable about it. We do know that parents that can work it out, that these children fare very well, and that divorce in and of itself does not create, have to create, a horrible situation for children. The key is, can the parents co-operate with each other? Can the pair share the child? Are the parents organized enough, and this doesn't matter if this is a toddler or a teenager; are they organized enough that they can share the child's life, that they can participate in the child's life? Can they be in the same room at the school play without hostility? Can they both track the academic progress of the child? Are they both able to be there with the paediatrician or be there when the child has some sort of medical emergency? In situations where that is possible, we know those children turn out very well. There's a lot of research on this. It's when parents are in constant conflict and drama and the child is being torn between one parent and the other parent with all the accusations and so on that these children do not turn out well, and you can see why.