How To Stop Obsessing About Your Lover

How can I stop obsessing about my lover?

An affair represents a man and a woman giving each other total attention: love, nurturance. You're sharing something. You're giving each other full attention. There's something getting fulfilled in you. Suddenly, you stop the affair. There's a void there. It's almost like an addiction. You can almost think of your affair as being like heroin, and you are coming off heroin. It is natural to crave and obsess about this person; to desire this person. It's also important that you stay away from your drug. You cannot go near the drug. You can't call the drug. You can't get a little dose of the drug. It's going to re-hook you, and it's going to mess up your current relationship that you're trying to rebuild and to which you're trying to be honest and loyal. So, the obsessing; we've got to stop it. You cannot indulge, because even in the obsessing, you're giving yourself a piece of the drug. Remembering, wishing, fantasizing, hoping; you've got to stop it. You've got to stop it. Make yourself stop. Instead of the pleasure, remember what a mess you got yourself into, and how much pain this could create for your family if they find out, or is creating for your family if they already have found out. You're already in a mess. Don't make it messier. You've chosen to stop the drug. You've got to stop the drug. Obsessing isn't going to help you. It's going to make you want it more, so stop the thinking. Stop the thinking. Distract yourself. Distract yourself. Get involved in a hobby, an activity; something to else to fill the void until you are over that person. Start focusing, once again on "How do I bring pleasure back to my home, to my relationship with my partner? How do I fill this void with the love of giving to my partner?"