How To Support Someone With BDD
Why doesn't my loved one believe me when I tell them they're not ugly?
Well, it's really difficult to give reassurance to somebody with BDD that actually sinks in because they really see what they see. They have this perceptual distortion. It's going to be hard for anybody else to convince them otherwise. A lot of times when it's a family member, they think the family member is just trying to make them feel better. They are just trying to placate them. They don't believe it.
Should I continue to offer reassurance to a loved one with BDD?
Sometimes it helps temporarily and if somebody keeps asking for it, it probably is helping maybe a little bit temporarily. But they just go back to feeling worse shortly after that. So in the long run, it actually doesn't help.Probably a better way of dealing with it is maybe one point in time giving the reassurance and then afterwards saying I know this is a reassurance seeking and it's going to make it worse if I answer it.
Why are people with BDD so selfish?
People sometimes wonder themselves, are they selfish? Why is that they are thinking about themselves all the time or other people may say "this person is thinking about himself, their appearance all the time, he is very self absorbed. Yes, they are self absorbed, but it is not because they want to be, and it is not because they feel good about doing that, it is because they just cannot stop thinking about their appearence.
Why is it so hard for someone with BDD to work?
Having BDD really does make it difficult to work because it is very hard to focus. It's very hard when you feel so self-conscious and when it takes you hours to prepare in the morning to get there. Sometimes there are other reasons why the person doesn't want to work. Maybe they want to stay dependent and maybe the BDD serves a function that way. So it can be complicated.
Is it my fault my child has BDD?
No. We think that the cause of BDD probably have multiple different sources, and one of them being biological. We don't think that there's a certain kind of parenting type that makes, makes BDD happen, and I think that emphasizing appearance may not help, but it probably doesn't itself cause BDD. It's not your fault.
