Judging A Man's Sole
Judging A Man's Sole
Donna Sozio (Author and Relationship Expert) gives expert video advice on: What can I tell about a man by looking at his shoes?; If I shouldn't judge a book by its cover, why should I judge a man by his shoes?; How can I check out a man's shoes without being noticed? and more...
What can I tell about a man by looking at his shoes?
Ok, there are three things you can tell about a man by looking at his shoes: his past attractions, his present attractions and his future attractions. Talking about the past, there's a saying, "We are what can't get rid of." So if he's got one pair of shoes that are just in the back, that might be collecting dust, but it doesn't matter he's still not giving it away, he's still holding on to it. Maybe they're a pair of urban, may be not urban, a pair of hiking boots that he climbed Mount Kilimanjaro and he's holding onto that memory, that's a past attraction. So what you can do to appear absolutely magical in his eyes is say,"Hey honey, why don't we go on a hike?" So you can create an activity or suggest some sort of a date that allows him to go back into the back of his closet and get out his past attraction shoes and you just appear absolutely magical. Present attractions are what I call his everyday shoes, these are by choice that is the most important thing, like may be he has to wear construction boots because he is a builder, that's function. These are the shoes that he feels most comfortable in when he can choose his shoes and that is his everyday attraction. Now future attractions; maybe there is something that he hopes to do and it will show up in his shoes. May be he hopes to buy a motorcycle and bought the boots, may be he hopes to sail around the world, he bought the deck shoes, and again to appear absolutely magical in his eyes-- he'll never now how you knew this about him-- suggest a sailing trip if he suddenly has a new pair of deck shoes, or just say something that will help bring out what the shoes represent to him.
If I shouldn't judge a book by its cover, why should I judge a man by his shoes?
OK, if I shouldn't judge a book by its cover, why should you judge a man by his shoes? The answer is simple. People think judgment is a bad thing. They think by judging you are leaving something out. But I like to think of judging as discernment and what the nuns didn't tell me in Catholic school is that it's OK to judge what is allowed or not allowed in my life. Where I go wrong is where I'm judging what is allowed or not allowed in someone else's life. So when it comes to your own cover, your own book cover, go ahead. It's not petty. It's not superficial. It's actually smart. It's quick. It keeps you on pace for where you want to go in your life. So judge away, discern away, whatever you want to call it. Have discernment in what you want in your life.
Does my body subconsciously react to a man's shoes?
Absolutely, your body subconsciously reacts to men's shoes. And this is why: The body never lies. So, it's so important to become aware of your, I call them, first response reactions when you see a man's shoes. Do your shoulders shoot for the sky? Do you turn into a pretzel? Do you imitate the scream? Or do you feel yourself moving in closer? Do you twirl your hair? Maybe you feel a little flush. So, if you listen to your body, and how you're reacting, how your body is reacting to men's shoes, again, it gives you really important information about how you feel about the quality that his shoes are expressing
What is 'spontaneous relationship combustion'?
Spontaneous relationship combustion is what happens, it's the seemingly sudden, you know blow up, unexpected blow up, of a relationship due to seemingly unforeseen circumstances. But actually, what happened is there's always signs, life is friendly, it's always giving us signs, and I have found in my own personal dating experiences the biggest signs about what to expect in a relationship can come from men's' shoes, and when you're not listening to the signs, they get bigger and stronger until things just explode to spontaneous combustion because they had to detonate because you weren't listening.
Can I trust my intuition when reading a man's shoes?
Intuition is your best friend. You can always trust your intuition when it comes to reading men's shoes. And this is why; men have upper body strength and women have their intuition. The stronger your intuition is the better. And when you think about it, think about how sexy men look flexing their muscles. Women look really attractive flexing our intuition. Those first response reactions that you get when you see a man's shoes seemingly come from out of the air. But rain doesn't come from nowhere. It comes from the sky. There's actually a process. There's a reason behind it. So absolutely you can trust your intuition about men's shoes. Trust it so much that even takes action on it. Otherwise, how else are you going to find information about a man? Snoop?
Can I really ask a man 'why are you wearing those shoes'?
So when you're asking men, "So where did you get those shoes?" remember approach is everything. And you just want to sort of approach him at an angle, not direct, like "Hey! Where'd you get those shoes?" You just want to say, "Hey, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Sure, ask me a question!" and say, "I was just curious about those shoes. What do you like about them? They're kind of interesting." And then he usually will tell you the whole story: "Well, you know, I bought them in Munich…” There's usually a story attached to shoes and if he says, "Well I bought them because they're comfortable", you might want to try to lift that up a little bit and see if there's anything underneath it.