Manners And Multicultural Rites Of Passage
What are some multicultural traditions associated with pregnancy?
There is nothing more critical to our species than the new comers, the future, our babies and we begin to consider all of that during the pregnancy. And one lovely ritual that Brahman Indians have is to give a party for the pregnant mother and just load her up with these wonderful bangle bracelets. I do not know if you can here them very well. And it's to emulate the sound of laughter that happiness and laughter should be a great part of that new person's life. In many cultures unfortunately males right from the start even before they are born are more desirable than females; and this is a Korean belief and this is suppose to represent the male member and if a pregnant woman will rub it over her stomach in the hopes that what develops will turn into a male child. I love it. I do not like the idea but I love the custom. Koreans are believed to have dreams that symbolize what their child would be like. Hawaiians mothers, Hawaiians future grandmothers have dreams that dictate what kinds of quilts they should make what designs and patterns should be made for that new baby because they always make a quilt for that new child.
Is money an appropriate gift for a new baby?
Money's very appropriate, and sometimes there are specialized envelopes for them. This is a Japanese envelope. It's called mizuhiki, which really pertains to a large variety of specially decorated envelopes. Obviously this is for babies. So, you would get an envelope like this, and then you would never put - just stick the money in it. You would put newly minted money, if you could find it, in a fresh, white envleope and then you would insert it inside this envelope. If you don't live in a Japanese area, then you would just give them any color envelope. However, if you were Chinese or Vietnamese, you would never give a white envelope, because white envelopes are only used for funerals."
What can I expect from Asian ceremonies celebrating a baby's survival?
In the Korean community, this is the dress that's worn on the first birthday that's celebrated. We have to remember that in olden times, there was a very high infant mortality rate. So, if a child lived to be one year old, that was a pretty good predictor that the child would survive. At the first birthday, they serve a special first birthday cake and most guests bring gold, real gold, gold bracelets; even if it's for boys or girls. If you can't afford to bring gold, and you're invited, to bring real gold, then anything else you bring for the baby will be accepted. It's usually only the initial close family members that can afford real gold. But, gold is the standard for gifts. Chinese have a birthday celebration - not a birthday celebration, a special celebration - again, observing that the baby has survived, called a red egg and ginger party, and they actually serve red eggs, again symbolizing life. The eggs are red because they have been dyed red, and ginger because it's healthy for the new mom. And that's usually where they announce the new baby's name. And again, you bring anything - anything that you bring is really acceptable there."
What is a Quinceaera?
Probably most of you are aware of bar mitzvahs and bat mitzvahs, a celebration when a Jewish boy and girl are considered to enter adulthood, not legally but symbolically. Some of you may be less familiar with a coming-of-age ceremony called a quinceanera, which is the fifteen-year-old celebration for girls. It represents the girl's transition from girlhood to adulthood, especially in consideration of her standing in church. Some of the things that will be displayed and also gifted will be her first pair of high heels and her last doll. This is the crown that she will wear at this event, and this is typical of the table decorations. Because she's fifteen she will have an escort, but they will be seven couples that will stand with her and escort her down the aisle. It will be a mass, and after the mass they go to a landmark. I live very close to a landmark, and every Saturday after twelve you can go there and see all the quinceanera parties. Most often, the girl, the quinceanera, meaning the fifteen-year-old, is wearing a dress of white, and then her girls in attendance will all be in one color, like bridesmaids, and the boys will all be in tuxedos. Appropriate gifts for that would be things that have to do with church and learning, and also signs, jewelry that the girl is now grown up and an adult, and she is literally queen for a day."
Why should I be wary of writing in red ink?
Red is generally a celebratory color, like I just showed you the red envelopes. Red is used for celebration all through Asia, except Korean Buddhists only write their names in red when people die or on the anniversary of their death. Therefore, we discovered that when teachers write in red ink on their students' papers, the families and the children are very threatened because it means they're going to die.