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Mid-First Date Advice For Men

Mid-First Date Advice For Men

Archie Gips (Dating Coach) gives expert video advice on: How do I know if a date is going well?; What do I do if my date keeps referring to her ex?; Is there anything I should avoid doing on a first date? and more...

What do I do if my date keeps referring to her ex?

If a woman mentions her ex on a first date, its generally not a good sign. Unfortunately, it probably means that she's still in some way hung up on him or is thinking about him. Even if she says "Oh, its been six years since I broke up with him", there's just no reason to bring up an ex on a first date. On the flip side, you should never mention your ex's as well. Just keep the whole ex situation out of the equation on the first date.

Should I pay for everything on a first date?

Whether you pay for the first date or not is really up to your discretion. If you want to look like a cheap guy, then don't pay. Seriously though, its an indication more of your interest level in the girl. If you really like the girl and you would like to date her again, it's generally a good idea to pay for the first date. If you're not so sure about her, or if you definitely don't think you ever want to go out with her again, then splitting the check wouldn't be so bad on the first date. The girl will definitely take note though, if you do not pay for the first date. So you have to be certain that you don't want to go out with her again or you're only interested in friendship if you do not pay the check on the first date.

How much should I spend on a first date?

How much you spend on a first date really shouldn't matter at all, it's more about having fun. Now if the woman is offended or thinks you are not spending enough money on her on the first date, then that's really a bad sign and you probably shouldn't be going out with that girl again.

Is there anything I should avoid doing on a first date?

When you're on a first date, there's definitely two things you should avoid. Number one is do not look around the room at other women. That's just rude, and you're not giving your full attention to the girl. Trust me, she will notice if your eye is wandering. Number two is don't answer your cell phone. Your cell phone should be switched to vibrate and it should be in your pocket on a first date. Now if you set up ahead of time your friend for the emergency call, then yes, that's the emergency where you need to get out of that situation. But you are enjoying yourself on the first date and your phone rings and you answer it, bad news dude. That's one big negative against you on a first date.

Is there anything I should avoid discussing on a first date?

On a first date, there's not many things that you should avoid discussing, except probably your e-girlfriend. It's a no win situation because you're comparing this woman who is sitting in front of you to one of your ex's, and it puts everyone in an uncomfortable situation. So without a doubt, never mention your ex on a first date. Even if she happens to bring up her ex-boyfriend, do not bring up your ex. Even if she's asking you and begging you, don't go there on a first date.

Should I ignore calls to my cell phone during a first date?

Under no circumstances is it cool to answer your cell phone during a first date. What you should do, is have your cell phone on vibrate. At some time during the evening, you'll go to the bathroom. When you're in the bathroom, you'll check your messages. If there's something urgent, or a matter that you have to attend to, then you can deal with it then. Do not answer your phone in front of the woman on a first date. Its incredibly rude and you'll lose major points with her.

How long should a first date last?

How long a first date lasts really depends on where you met her. If its an internet date or blind date, then the general rule of thumb is one hour or two hours at the most, just enough time to get to know her, have some fun, and end the first date. Of course, if it's going really well and there's just incredible chemistry, then of course you can continue the first date. If you've met the girl already, and you met her in a bar and you've talked with her on the phone, and you've got a good vibe going with her, then the first date should go as long as you guys are enjoying yourselves. Just look for those body language clues from her, and if you sense that she's getting bored, or if she's tired, then you should definitely be the one to end the first date. Don't let her end it, but end it on a friendly note. Just say, "Hey, I've had a wonderful time. I think we should leave now." It's always important that as the man, you are the one that dictates when the first date ends. You never want to get in the situation where she's cutting the first date short on you. Again, remember the principle of least interest. The person who seems like they are least interested is the one that has the upper hand.

Should I ask my date if she wants to come to my place if the date's going well?

Now sometimes you'll be on a first date where you're having an incredible time, and you'll be spending hours together, and it'll come to a point where you might want to invite her back to your place, or she might want to invite you back to hers. Where do you go is always a tricky situation. First of all, you really need to get clear signs from her that she's interested in you. At this point on the first date you probably should have kissed her. There should have been some real physical connection between you; real chemical and physical attraction. At that point, its really up to her. Allow her to decide where she feels more comfortable, going back to your place, or going to her place. And if she's not comfortable with either one of those, then that's fine. And then you just kiss her goodnight after the first date and you say you'll see her another time.