Multicultural Manners And Hospitality
What is important for me to know if I am hosting multicultural guests?
If I were entertaining people from many cultures, the first thing I would do is investigate what, if any, food taboos they might have. I'm not going to be like the guys at work who invited all of the engineers over for barbecued spare ribs when they were Iranian engineers and they didn't eat pork. That's a really big one. But I would first find that out. My style would be, when they come over, I would say, "We always serve this for an appetizer. In your country, what kinds of appetizers, or what kinds of things do you eat before you get to the main meal?" Just turn it into a learning experience for everyone, as well as yourself, and address the issue, not just pretend it's not there.
How do I introduce people from different cultures if they have different greeting beliefs?
If you have a group of people from different cultures, with different greeting beliefs, I would start by introducing the youngest to the oldest. Pick out the oldest person there and make them the person of honor. Whether they choose to shake hands or whatever, "I would like you to meet Mr. Osaka. He's the Mayor of our city and this is his wife Mrs. Osaka." Use first and last names and titles. "This is Mrs. So and So" and sort of give a little identification, not big, but just so they can sort of get a handle on it. In one of my ESL books, I have them practice handshakes, abrasos, bowing, namastes, but you can't do that with your guests.
What do I need to know to be a good guest in a multicultural home?
You could put yourself in your normal way and just be observant and take cues. If they say a prayer at the table, or if they do a lot of talking, if they don't talk, you just have to go with whatever they are doing.
If I don't like or eat the food served by my host, what should I say and do?
If I eat it, I will break out in a rash and start itching." I don't know. Usually, my first encounters with making a meal for someone when I was first married in particular, I really would really get flawed. "Oh I forgot to tell you I don't eat meat," or "I forgot to tell you, I don't eat this." Well you usually serve so much food you don't have to mention it. There are usually so many side dishes, it's really going to be irrelevant.
What should I do if I feel my host has offended me?
If someone has offended you, you need to let them know. I don't think you need to let them know in front of other people because then that's going to boomerang, everyone else will get into it, but I think you should let them know that what they said or did was offensive. A lot will depend on whether or not you wish to continue the relationship, and so that will sort of dictate your level of diplomacy. But for you own maintenance of self esteem, you're not a doormat and if somebody has done something to offend you, you really need to let them know. But a lot has to do with how mature they are and how they take it. They may be offended and then it's over.