Talking About Bulimia
What can I do if I suspect a friend has bulimia?
As in many problems that occur in teenagers and during school, often the first people to notice are friends, and what we say in psychiatry is if friends see severe behavior, don't keep a secret. It's not really being a friend to your peer to keep a secret. Even notifying the peer's parents seems like a breach of confidentiality, but if you see your very best friend binging and regurging, sometimes it is necessary to notify a relative.
What is the best way to approach a son or daughter who may have bulimia?
Usually the best approach is with both parents, if it's a traditional family, to sit down with the teenager or with the young adult and to say openly that "we've observed these things and we are concerned", and to come right and say what it is that the parent is concerned with. That is, "We think your health is being affected" or "We're seeing unusual behaviors in the way you're approaching your self-management or your nutrition and we feel there may be a leading disturbance." Sometimes peers will report behavior to parents and that can be important eventually, to involve members of the peer group - if that can be done without embarrassment. Sometimes that can be done very supportively. Then, in a step-wise way, arrange an evaluation - nutritional, medical, psychiatric and psychological evaluation.
What is not a good way to approach a son or daughter who may have bulimia?
Some parents go around surreptitiously searching the patients' room and that sort of thing. In general, sometimes that can backfire and may not be the best way.
