The Business Introduction In American Business
What is the appropriate way to introduce people in a business setting?
No one does business introductions today and it's because they don't know how. Indeed, if you're standing there with two people that you know, and you want to introduce them, there are a few things you have to know about that introduction. If you're introducing two people, you use the name of the more important person in the introduction first, as this is the appropriate way to introduce people in a business setting. Lets imagine that you're introducing the CEO of your company to your next door neighbour. You would use the name of the CEO first, and introduce your neighbour to the CEO. For example, "Jim, Id like you to meet my neighbour, Sarah." It's that simple. Or, because people really don't know what to do, people use "Sarah, Jim. Jim, Sarah". It makes it very easy and actually, that's OK as we're very casual in business today and people really don't want formal introductions. It's appropriate to just remember that one line, and I'm going to repeat it because I think it's that important. You use the person of most importance's name first in the introduction. So as your CEO, Jim, is more important, you'd say, "Jim, Id like you to meet my neighbour, Sarah." There's only a couple of exceptions to this rule. One of the exceptions is if a client comes on your campus, then the client's name trumps that of your CEO. So then it becomes, "Mary, Id like you to meet the CEO of our company, Jim." There's another exception which I should mention, and that is if someone has a dignitary title. They often will trump as a Senator, Mayor, Governor or President.
Is there an easy way to remember who I should introduce to whom?
There is an easy way to remember who is introduced to whom. The person whose name gets used first, all over the world and in any circumstances, it would sort of make him the most important person on earth - that person is the pope. It's not because of he's the head of the roman catholic church in as much as is it he's the longest line of held offices on the planet. Since 90 AD, there was a pope and that's been a consistent office. So we acknowledge that office and thus everyone on the earth is introduced to the pope. So it would be "your holiness" (which is his title), "Id like to introduce you to my aunt, Mildred", for example. When it comes to the president of the United States, if that introduction were made to his holiness, it would be "your holiness, may I introduce you to the president of the United States" and then his name.
Should I address clients by first or last name?
When it comes to addressing clients by their first or last names, every situation is different. If I, Phyllis Davis, am calling on the director of training that I want to go in and do some editor training for, for lets say, Microsoft, I might call the head of training for Microsoft by their last name; using Mr. or Mrs. and then their last name. But if they want me to call them by their first name, they will. If I'm in the office and it's a small office, I might say, "Joe, it's so nice to meet you." You see the difference? So you have to be a little bit sensitive to power when deciding whether to address clients by their first or last names.
How can I look gracious when making an introduction?
Looking gracious when making an introduction is done with a smile. Now, let me talk about the smile for a minute. And I want everybody who's listening today to practice this. I want you to go in the bathroom and learn to smile and talk through your teeth. It seems very counter-intuitive in this regard too, but if you learn to talk through your teeth, you look relaxed and happy and comfortable and approachable, and thus gracious when making an introduction. So do an introduction while you're smiling and your teeth show. It's very congenial, but it must be done in a state showing you're excited to introduce these two people. So, show your teeth. I show my teeth a lot when I'm speaking and teaching. It seems so funny, doesn't it? But, it really makes a difference because it makes you look relaxed and more gracious when you are making an introduction.
What are the other elements of a good introduction?
Other elements of a good introduction that I implement is that I like to include a little bit of information about each person. so that if I were to step away it would be an ice-breaker. For example, if I were introducing the CEO of my company to my next door neighbour, I would say, “Jim, I'd like you to meet Sarah.” And then I'd turn to Jim and say, “Sarah and I live next door to each other.” And then I might turn to my neighbour and say, “Sarah, Joe is the CEO of my company.” So, if I were to step away at that moment, they would have enough of an ice-breaker to continue that conversation., and that is another element of a good introduction.
What should I do when I am introduced to someone?
When you are introduced to some, say the CEO, you should make an effort to ask questions such as "How long have you been CEO?" The CEO might say your name, and then ask you how long have you lived in that neighbourhood. You should ask them some little something to let them know that you were listening. We live in such an impersonal world, so if there is any way that you can do anything to focus on them, and take the focus off of you to create rapport, that's that extra effort and the best ting to do when you are introduced to someone.
How can I remember someone's name when I am introduced to him or her?
Remembering people's names when you are introduced to them is an art-form. In fact, I taught a stranger that this weekend because he didn't remember my name. I said, let me teach you a trick and he was fascinated. There are several tricks that you can do and one of them is to write that person's name on their forehead in black magic marker in your mind's eye. So I look at you, and I write the word, “Tamara” in black magic marker or “David” across your forehead. There are also many other ways that you can do it for. Another one is name association. If I see you, I can picture you as a tap dancer – Tamara, the tap dancer, and I can remember your name through name association. Or, David as the DJ, and when I see you, I think of you as a DJ or as a tap dancer. These are great ways of remembering people's names when you are introduced to them.
Why is it so important to remember people's names in business and why is it so difficult?
Remembering peoples names is one of the most important things you can do in business because it means you're listening, it means you care. And it's not appropriate to just not listen to their name when it's being said. Indeed that's the problem today because only a very small percentage of people are what we consider auditory, we're mostly visual people today, that's why it's so hard to remember people's names when you are introduced to them. Now, if someone gives me their business card, or gives you their business card, we have a higher chance of remembering their name than if we just hear it. So the decision is a choice. When I hear people's names that they tell me the first time, I listen. I really make a conscious decision to listen to their name. I can also remember people's names if I see them written more easily because again, I am more visual than I am auditory. But the more sophisticated business person I become over the years, the more auditory I become because its all about listening when you are being introduced to someone.
What if I blank on the name of someone I know?
If you blank on the name of someone you know, then asking for forgiveness is the first thing you do, not apologize. You don't say “I'm sorry I don't remember your name”, you say “Forgive me.” And then if you can remember any details about them whatsoever, for example, “I remember you. I met you at the conference last year. Let's see, you live on a lake outside of Chicago and you've got two Golden Labs. Now I can remember all that. Forgive me, I just can't remember your name. Tell us what it is.” And then you move on. You don't make a big deal out of blanking on someone's name you know.
