Why Guys Cheat

Why do guys cheat?

I think there are lot of reasons why men cheat. Why do women cheat? People cheat I guess because they feel their needs are not being fulfilled within the relationship. Overexposure to so many different choices, creating boundaries around your needs that are sort of immediate gratification needs for your family and your wife or your husband for that matter. And I think it's easy to go out and follow your chemistry and have the luxury of the vacation of being unfaithful but if that's not the agreement within your relationship, that relationship can be severely damaged by those fleeting moments and you have to determine whether you're really ready to sit down and do the work that a relationship entails. And possibly let your wife know, I need a little bit of romance let's figure out how to make this happen for us. And it's not always easy but I think a lot of the time; men see the marriage and children as – ‘Wow, this is really serious and this is really heavy and I don't want to be this old and I don't want to be this responsible.' It's easier to run out and see someone that doesn't represent all that. But that is not healthy for the long-term goal of creating a family of trust together. So it has to be addressed if you want to maintain that relationship, you've got to address those issues before it arises to really destroy it.

What are the signs he's cheating?

If someone's cheating on you, there's a break in communication and there's really a break in understanding each other and getting a sense of the priorities for each other. So I think if someone is making excuses and is no longer flirtatious and available and saying "I'm working late," or they seem less and less interested in sex or they seem a little bit more paranoid or agitated or more aggressive, these are all signs that something is going on - some sort of disconnection. I think that it's important to try and get a sense of what's going on. If someone is starting to withdraw and working longer hours and getting more aggressive and getting more emotionally disconnected and not making time for you, regardless of whether it's an affair or it's an emotional disconnection, I think it's important to set time aside to really talk about what you've noticed, and certain things like, "You seem to be working later these days. You seem less connected and we're not talking more -- what's going on?" and exploring that in a practical way. I think those are all indications of a relationship that needs to be looked at. It's fine to have a bad week or a couple bad weeks, but if this is a pattern for a month or 2 months, and the relationship is really kind of stretching thin and no longer the priority, if that doesn't get addressed it can just get worse.