Your Guy's Friends
Can men and women really be just friends?
So this is a big controversial ‘when Harry met Sally' type of topic, can men and women be friends? Yes, I actually think men and women can be friends. I think that you have to make sure there are boundaries within the friendship and when other people are involved for instance if you are married or if you have a girlfriend you have to make sure that this is as platonic as a friendship can be and you always have to have some sense of boundaries between friendships that are male-female friendships. I do believe that there is great insight to being friends with the opposite sex, you can ask a guy and gal questions and its fun to be able to have a different perspective and its very valuable because women can be very emotional and men can be very analytical and pragmatic and you can ask your male friend different perspectives that really may help you gain perspectives on dating relationships and life.
Should I worry about my guy's female friends?
I think that if your boyfriend or your husband has female friends and you know these female friends and there is good boundaries within those friendships, I think that is a positive thing for him to be able to have confidants and female friends to bounce relationship questions off of, etc. But I think if he's spending more time with his female friends and confiding in them things that he's really not talking to you about, it's a red flag. You always have to make sure that your primary relationship is the priority. You have to make sure he has that on his radar as well.
Should I worry if my guy is still friends with his ex?
I actually think that this is another really big topic. Is it healthy to maintain friendships with exes? I think it really depends on the individual and the agreement that you have with your current partner. Do they feel comfortable with this? I think it's kind of sweet in some aspects where you loved this person and you were involved with them for a lot of reasons, and because it didn't work out romantically doesn't mean that this person should be completely dismissed out of your life. I don't know. That's a real personal decision. I see that there's a lot of value in having someone in your life that knew you in an intimate way, but now has grown into a friendship. But you have to really make sure that both parties that are involved in the primary relationship feel comfortable with this friendship and, ultimately, you always have to make a decision based on your primary relationship and that comfort level.
Why is my guy jealous of my male friends?
I think that if you are in a relationship and you have males friends, you have to make sure that your partner feels secure in your relationship. You have to let him know that he is the number one and that you have boundaries with these male relationships and never choose a friendship over your primary relationship, that's a really really important point is you always make your partner feel like they're the priority. So if he's feeling threatened you need to address that and find out why and make him feel secure so ultimately you can have a relationship with male friends but with boundaries.
Why won't my guy introduce me to his friends?
You need to find out why you've never met his friends and if there's something that he's really trying to keep separate that he feels uncomfortable with you meeting his friends. I think you know if you've met his friends and they drop by and you've seen them periodically and ultimately he keeps them sort of as a separate resource, that's fine. But if there's zero contact between you and them that's not necessarily a good thing.
What do guys really do when they are out with their friends?
Well, I think guy time is really important for men. To be able to go out, talk about chicks, talk about sex, talk about work, talk about whatever they want to talk about so they feel free and they're bonding, and it really is something that is their private time, their downtime, and I think is very crucial to your partner feeling fulfilled ... you know ... being able to have that independent guy time. I think it's an incredibly healthy thing. And they may be talking about things that are sort of just random, "banging on the chest" type of male behavior, which I think is just fine and healthy.
